Blog// LGBT Adoptive Parents

Do You Really Want a Closed Adoption?

Adoptive Baby

If you’re looking to adopt a child, there are a lot of steps involved and decisions to make. One of the most important decisions is the one regarding the type of adoption you want. Before prospective adoptive parents apply for an adoption, they usually do a lot of research learn about adoption types. Usually, you are presented with three adoption types - open, semi - open, and closed. You should keep in mind that you should tailor the type of adoption to your interests, the interests of a birthmother, and the interests of the child. If you’re considering closed adoption, you’re probably wondering is it the right choice for you.

Closed adoption:

In confidential adoption, the adopters and birthparents have no identifying information about each other. However, even closed adoptions are not completely closed. Since studies show that adding some form of openness is healthy for everyone involved in the adoption. Even closed adoptions include some sharing of photos or letters. Of course, the birth parents can refuse to accept any information on the child or the adoptive family, but it is strongly encouraged that the birth parents leave the door open for some updates on the child. The communication between birthparents and adoptive parents occurs through a middleman, usually an attorney or an adoption agency. Before you make your decision to pursue a closed adoption, make sure to do formal research. There are a lot of great resources online such as blogs for birthmothers and adoptive parents. You should also consider connecting with someone who’s willing to share their experiences about a closed adoption.

What are the pros and cons with a closed adoption?

The closed adoption experiences can vary depending on individual circumstances. Here are some potential advantages of a closed adoption...

  • Some people feel threatened and vulnerable by their decision to place a child for adoption and they only want privacy. Some birthmothers also say how they needed a sense of closure and choosing a closed adoption allowed them to move with their lives after the adoption.
  • Adoptive parents usually think that a closed adoption eliminates the risk of possible complications that could arise when birthparents are involved in your child’s life.
  • Closed adoption can potentially provide family freedom because there’s no need to physically share the child with birthparents at all.

There are also some disadvantages of a closed adoption you should consider...

  • In a closed adoption, there’s no access to additional medical information about a birth family.
  • This type of adoption can be hard for your child because he or she will know almost nothing about the motivation behind the adoption.
  • When a child is adopted, the adoptive parents become the legal parents of the child. But, the child does have a genetic history, and birthparents are a part of that history. The child may be curious about what this means to his or her development as time goes on. 

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