To many who are experiencing an unplanned pregnancy, the concept of adoption is not something with which they are familiar. Sure, you have heard about it. But what actually goes into it? What is the adoption process like? What does it involve? Unfortunately, movies, television shows, books and the media tend to portray the subject in a rather sensationalized manner. The good, run-of-the-mill stories are ignored while the scary ones are featured on our newscasts. How, then, are you supposed to know what the adoption process is like as you begin making decisions for you and your child? Furthermore, how do you know if adoption is the right path for you?
Birthparents place their children for adoption for any number of reasons. While one expectant parent might not find an issue with a certain circumstance, another might find that same issue to be the main reason for their decision to place. While it is a very personal decision, there are some issues that we see time and time again when expectant parents are considering adoption for their child.
Some parents feel that without a stable income, they cannot provide their child with the type of life they feel that their child deserves. It can seem overwhelming to suddenly have another person who depends on you not just financially but emotionally. Maybe you already have children who depend on you emotionally and financially and cannot care for another child.
finding a two parent household
In a perfect world, every parent who conceived a child would want to be present and emotionally invested in that child's life. Unfortunately, that is not the case. Some expectant mothers experiencing an unplanned pregnancy find themselves without a present, invested partner early on in that pregnancy. Due to personal or moral beliefs, or even past experience, some feel that having a two-parent home is an absolute must for any child that they are bringing into the world.
feeling that age or inexperience offers an unfair disadvantage
While the average age of a relinquishing mother is in her early 20s, some are younger and some are older. The recognition of the need for things like a high school diploma or a college degree to properly provide for a child ARE reasons that younger parents might consider placement.
lack of support from family members
While some mothers and fathers are able to continue on with their education or lifestyle after an unplanned pregnancy and decision to parent, it is often due to the help of friends and family members. If your own parents have all but thrown you out of the house (or, in some cases, done just that), it may seem very scary to make an attempt at parenting with no help.
Other reasons include things like rape and incest, homelessness, an abusive situation or simply wanting a better life for your child than you know you can provide. Keep in mind that no one can or should tell you that your reasons for placing a baby for adoption are wrong.
In the end, the decision to place a child for adoption is rarely based on one reason alone. Many reasons often come together to form the final decision, and it is not a decision that should be taken lightly. You could even say that it is not a decision that should be made alone. LifeLong Adoptions is here walk you through it. Click here to review your rights as a potential birthmother working with us.