Blog// For Birthmothers

6 Myths about Placing a Baby for Adoption

birthmother place baby for adoption

A decision to place a baby for an adoption is not an easy one. What makes it even harder are numerous myths about placing a baby for adoption. An adoption, as presented in media, is often full of myths and misconceptions. That’s why it’s easy to forget what the adoption is all about, creating a family. Also, each person has their own unique experience and it’s normal that people talk differently about the adoption. Women who are considering adoption for their baby should know some common myths about placing a baby for adoption.

Myth 1. A birthmother who chooses adoption will have emotional problems.

It’s important to understand that an adoption gives your baby a stable future and caring home. When you choose to place your baby for adoption, that is a sign of an unconditional love because you put your baby’s needs above your own needs. After the adoption, some women do experience grief and that’s completely normal, but it’s not going to last forever. Adoptive parents also feel stressed once they adopt because it might take time to bond with their newborn baby.

Myth 2. Birthmothers are usually teenagers.

Placing a child for adoption is a painful decision and it doesn’t need to be judged. One common opinion is that most birthmoms choosing to place a baby in the adoption process are teenagers. The truth is that women in their twenties and thirties who already have a child are facing economic pressure, and are choosing adoption as a better option.

Myth 3. The birthmother will regret her decision.

In an adoption process, a birthmother has a right to choose. She can choose an open adoption, a family for her baby, and she can also continue communicating with her child. It is difficult not to regret your decision when you invest months thinking about what to do, and how to choose the option that is best for you and your baby.

Myth 4. Adoptive parents and birthparents raise a child together.

In an open adoption, a birthmother and adoptive parents talk openly about everything including the frequency of visits and desired ways of communicating, but definitely not co-parenting. After the adoption is finalized, adoptive parents become legal parents of their adopted child.

Myth 5. An adopted child will grow up feeling rejected and bitter.

This is another common myth about placing a baby for adoption. An adopted child will grow by knowing that his family was created by adoption. The child will understand that his birthmother has selflessly planned a bright future for her child.

Myth 6. The adoption process is secretive.

Birthmothers can choose adoptive parents and meet them, especially via domestic newborn adoption. If a birthmother doesn’t want to share her identifying information, that would be classified as a closed adoption. All in all, this all depends on a birthmother’s decision.

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