Blog// LGBT Adoptive Parents

How to Cope with the Stress of Adoption

The adoption process is filled with hope and happiness, but because expectations and emotions are high, the process isn’t without its stressful moments. There are also many unknowns along the way to making a this very difficult decision, so it’s normal for adoptive parents to feel stressed out. This stress can have negative effects on your health, communication, and even your relationship, so it’s a good idea to learn how to cope with it.

Why is adoption stressful?

During the adoption process, you will find yourself making life-changing decisions that can be both exciting and stressful. Many elements of adoption process are out of your control and that usually brings stress. The pre-adoption process is often long and frustrating because there are a lot of interviews, background checks, and home visits. Adoptive parents strive to have the perfect home, pleasant personalities, and financial security, but it can be stressful to maintain a perfect image throughout the entire process. Anxiety about the birthmother also makes the adoption process stressful. The stress of adoption can have negative effects on your health and it can be damaging to your family. Many individuals suffer from adoption-related stress, so the most important thing is to recognize the signs of adoption stress and learn how to manage it.

How to cope with the stress

  1. Stay busy and don’t allow the adoption process to take over your life. Keep up with your hobbies, your job, and connections with your friends.
  2. Don’t let negative thoughts in. Try to stay positive and focus on the end result. In the end, you’ll be welcoming a new baby into your family after the process is finished.
  3. Prepare yourself for the parental role to be the best parent and a role model to your child.
  4. Keep an adoption journal because writing things down can be very therapeutic.
  5. If you can, get a massage or find some other way to relax your mind and body. It’s important to pay attention to self-care.
  6. When you feel sad, share that with your partner or your family. It’s not good for you to bottle up your emotions. Try to talk with others as much as possible because people who love you are the best people to be there for you.
  7. Try to understand what it feels like when the stress is coming on, and work to get ahead of it before it brings you down.
  8. Focus on preparing your house for the baby.
  9. If you can’t deal with the stress of adoption on your own, connect with others in similar situations. Support groups, for example, are a great way to share your feelings in a safe environment and receive supportive feedback.

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