Journey to Fatherhood
From the moment we embarked on this journey, our hearts were filled with the desire to expand our family. We had dreamed of parenthood since the early days of our relationship and knew that adoption was the path we wanted to take.
The decision to work with LifeLong Adoptions came after some initial struggles with other agencies. In our search for an LGBTQIA+ friendly agency, we stumbled upon LifeLong and reached out. Their prompt response and warm welcome assured us that we were in the right place.
As we set out on the adoption journey, our feelings were a whirlwind of emotions. Anxiety, nervousness, excitement, and a touch of fear all played their part. We knew we were entering uncharted territory, and the unpredictability of it all was both thrilling and daunting.
Great Support
Our friends and family had always known of our wish to grow our family. When we shared our decision to work with LifeLong, they weren't surprised in the least. Their unwavering support and encouragement fueled our determination to make this journey a success. Having great support made everything a little easier.
We had no way of knowing what our journey would look like, but we knew with the right support, we would be able to make it through anything. During our time at LifeLong, we had the privilege to be chosen six different times. We were always honored to be able to talk with an expectant mother. It can be heartbreaking when an opportunity does not work out, but we understood that came with the journey.
Big Decisions
Choosing an open or closed adoption was a significant decision for us. Initially we had reservations about the idea of openness, but our perspective evolved. Our home study social worker shared her own adoption journey, highlighting the beautiful relationships she maintained with her children's birthfamilies. This transformed our viewpoint, and we became open to the possibility of an open or semi-open adoption.
We found it was important to try our best to be as open as we could. Hearing different perspectives and receiving information along the way helped us make the right choices for our family. Big decisions needed to be made, and we did not want our decisions to reflect our fears but rather our hopes of being fathers.
The One
Meeting the birthmother for the first time was a profound experience. It was like encountering an angel on Earth. Both the birthmother and birthfather were incredibly kind and gracious. Our conversations reassured them that they had indeed made the perfect choice by entrusting us with their child. Everything seemed to fall into place, and this opportunity felt different than the others.
The call informing us that our baby was being born was an intensely emotional moment. We had always talked about expanding our family, and finally our dream was coming true. The journey to meet our child was a surreal adventure: a mix of emotions, anticipation, and overwhelming joy. I don’t think we have ever experienced something like this or ever will again. We are still so thankful for each day with our child and the gift the birthparents made possible.
Meeting our daughter for the first time was like holding our hearts in our hands. As we held her, she sighed deeply and seemed to settle contentedly. It was as though she recognized she was finally in the loving embrace she had been waiting for. Little did she know we were right where we had waited to be for so long.
Our relationship with our baby's birthmother remains close. We keep in touch through texts, calls, and regular updates with pictures. It's a connection we deeply value and cherish and we know our daughter will cherish as well.
Best Advice
The adoption process came with its own set of challenges. Trusting the process and maintaining patience were the most significant hurdles. Days without connection felt endless, but after connecting with our daughter’s birthmother, the wait leading up to our daughter's birth seemed to pass quickly. Adoption is undeniably a lengthy process. To endure the wait, we began writing a journal to our unborn child, sharing our feelings and thoughts throughout the adoption journey. This practice has been a beautiful way to bond with our daughter, even before her arrival.
As for adopting again, we're keeping our options open, perhaps considering it once our daughter is a bit older. For now, we're savoring every moment of her growth and development. To other adoptive parents, we offer this advice: build a support system, connect with fellow adoptive parents, and don't let anxiety overshadow the joy and excitement of the process. Trust that, like us, you will find your path to the perfect addition to your family.
This journey has brought us immeasurable joy, and our hearts are filled with gratitude for the precious gift of parenthood that adoption has bestowed upon us.