Adoption is a beautiful process that requires love, selflessness, and humility. It can be a dream come true for families who want to grow through adoption, and a blessing for a child in need. However, as with any new venture, there are several obstacles that may come along the way.
If you’re considering adoption or if you’re in the beginning stage of your adoption curiosity, consider these unexpected stressors that could throw a wrench in your plans. Knowing about these possibilities ahead of time can help you plan accordingly.
The Child Has More Issues Than You Expected
When you’re adopting a child who is over the age of three into your family, it’s safe to assume that they remember their life before. This is especially difficult in an open adoption situation where the child remembers the parent.
They could have gone through some horrible experiences that left them traumatized, or they may not understand why they are being placed with a new family. This can result in a lot of pent up anger and aggression that is sometimes released in an unhealthy manner. This could be incredibly difficult for new parents who don’t know how to deal with emotional issues.
Expenses Begin to Increase
Raising children, in general, is expensive. From clothing to food, the costs seem to just add up. This could cause any parent to stress. However, the stress of a new situation multiplied by unexpected expenses can cause a whirlwind of anxiety.
With children comes a majority of unexpected expenses, especially medical ones. This can cause a lot of stress on new families both emotionally and financially.
The Stress of Taking in Someone New
Although you go into the situation of adoption knowing that you’ll be housing someone you’ve never met, it’s still quite the eye-opener when they get there. You have to adapt to their personalities, make sure they mesh well with the family and even learn more about what makes them tick.
While these are all beautiful aspects of human relationships, it can be quite a challenge, especially if personalities don’t mesh well at first. There could be a conflict between one parent and the child or other children within the home. Developing positive coping strategies is key to navigating this newfound life.
Discovering Who You Are as a Parent
Navigating the wide world of parenting is difficult, especially when you’re adopting a child. This can bring on a whole new set of stressors that can make you feel guilty, depressed, and sometimes regretful. In addition, finding your personal style of parenting comes with its own set of challenges. Finding your footing as a parent can bring about stressors you didn’t even know existed.
Although adoption is a beautiful process, it can also be a dramatic learning curve that’s filled with ups and downs and everything in between. If you’re dealing with the stressors of adoption, don’t feel alone! Several parents go through this at some point or another during the beginning stages of their adoption. However, remember why you chose this option and keep moving forward so you and your family can find your footing together.